Words

Do you realize how some words seem so innocent until they are used to describe you or the situation that you are in? For example the word overweight, innocent enough right? When you look at another person who is technically “overweight” by a few pounds, it’s sometimes difficult to tell that they are. However when we as individuals tip the scale just a pound or two over our goal weight or our range for our height, we freak out and increase the workout or decrease the eating. We have built in our minds that we stepped out of what should be normal and perfect.

Something similar just happened to me about a week ago just with a different word. Infertility. This is the one word that no woman ever wants to hear about herself. For me this wasn’t going to be a problem. Why? Because ever since I was a little girl, I have dreamed of adopting. My parents can attest to the fact that I was always one to watch “Adoption Stories” on Discovery Health and even ask them to adopt a little brother or sister for me. Alas, adoption was not part of my childhood, but I knew it would be a part of my life as a parent. Fortunately, I found someone that shares this dream of mine.

So why did this word affect me so much when the doctor said that “You and your husband are struggling with infertility.”? We were already aware that we were going to struggle with getting pregnant, so how can one little word cause emotional mayhem? In our heads, we both knew that this wasn’t the end of the line. We still have many fertility options, and we both want to adopt. However, hearing that you are “nonovulatory” can hurt a woman’s ego as much as a man who is told that their swimmers were not swimming. It’s not even so much my ego that hurt as it was my heart even though my head knew that everything would be okay.

Sure we both still want to adopt, but we also would like to have biological children. Both would be a blessing from God. We are still struggling with our options of what to do first as both fertility and adoption can be very expensive and an emotional roller-coaster.  Some would tell us, “You guys are young just give it time.” And yes, they are right we do have time. However, we are trying to get our options figured out for the time being. So all this boils down to is, we are asking for prayer in our guidance from the Lord. He is our strength in times of trouble!

Jogging Life

As many of you know from Facebook, I have picked up jogging as a new habit. I am still far from considering myself as anywhere close to being a runner, but I am slowly but surely beginning to jog more often and longer then I have in my entire life. 

So let's start from the beginning. I remember as a kid being told that I was built for long distance running. Of course at the time and pretty well all my life, I have ignored that and said "No way could I ever be a runner." However about a year ago, I decided to give running a try in order to try to lose the 30 pounds that I gained after Andrew & I got married plus some more to get back to where I was in high school. It started very small, walk 5 minutes then jog 30 seconds. After a while I just gave up as I normally do because I didn't have the time nor the energy.

I picked it back up for a while in the fall but lost interest again. Typical and sad reality of it. This last spring though, Drew and I decided to come in early in the mornings to work out sporadically. By sporadically I mean we would have a good week then take like 3 or 4 off then have a good week or 2. You get the pattern. However one day in April after Drew left for class, I decided that I WANTED to jog for a bit just to see how I could do. I ended up jogging 12 laps on the indoor track (a little over 1 mile). I was amazed with how good I felt afterward. However, Drew was graduating and again I got out of the habit of working out and jogging.

It wasn't until the end of June beginning July that I started jogging again, but I couldn't get back to that mile. It was like I was hitting a brick wall with what I felt I was capable of doing. It wasn't until I started praying about it that I was able to hit my mile again. Since then the Lord has shed the preconceived ideas that I had that I could never become that long distance runner that I was told I could be. He has helped me push against that brick wall that was the barrier in my jogging. I have come to see that it is not by my strength that I am capable of the jogging that we have been doing.

God has pushed my limits and shown me that I can be more than I ever thought I could in something as simple as exercise. I can't wait to He shows me what I can be in regards to the limits and small goals I have placed on something as large as life! He has already given me the most amazing life partner than I could ever dream of how much more could He bless us? I do know though that He has great plans for us despite my fears and seeing us running into brick walls with regards to many things in life, but I know from experience that he can move those obstacles out of the way and push us past the finite into the infinite experiences that only come with being in His will! 

Thank you Lord for being our strength as a couple and as individuals!

Moving Forward

So, I decided to start a blog. I don't know how good I will be with this, but we will try it out. I tend to be one of those that starts something, but doesn't have the will to finish it. Maybe having something to keep me accountable will help.

Let's see what is new with our family. Drew graduated from LeTourneau in May! I am so proud of him! He is now working full-time at Alcatel-Lucent here in Longview. He is, however, a contract worker without benefits; therefore, he is still looking for full-time employment that has benefits and is more in his line of expertise (namely aviation). It has been nice though having a second full-time income. I am still working for LeTourneau in the Registrar's Office. I am very thankful that I work with wonderful people because it makes coming into work easier than it normally would be.

Also, Drew and I have been on weight watchers since February. So far Drew has lost around 35 pounds. I have lost about 20 pounds. We are only about 1/3 of the way to our goal, and we have both gotten off track unfortunately. However, we have picked up jogging and just general walking. We usually go out to either jog or walk about 4 times a week, so we are praying that it makes up for our lack of watching what we eat.


Right now, we have both come to the realization that God has us where we are for a reason. We may have plans and thoughts for our future in our head, but God knows what future He has for us and is preparing us in every way possible for that future. Until such time as He shows us His plan, we will just keep moving forward and thank Him for all that He has done for us thus far!